June 24, 2008

when your dreams become reality, they are no longer your dreams

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[More thoughts on “How To Be Crea­tive”:]
37. When your dreams become rea­lity, they are no lon­ger your dreams.

If you are suc­cess­ful, it’ll never come from the direc­tion you pre­dic­ted. Same is true if you fail.

[A Brief His­tory Of The “Car­toons Drawn On The Back Of Busi­ness Cards” For­mat.]
As this book reaches its end, I’m thin­king how it’s been OVER TEN YEARS since I first came up with the “car­toons drawn on the back of busi­ness cards” for­mat. And it seems like I’VE ONLY JUST got them to the com­mer­cially suc­cess­ful level I thought they were capa­ble of reaching.
Bet­ter late than never, I sup­pose.
A friend asked me recently, had I known it would take this long, would I have bothe­red in the first place? I have in my mind this fan­tasy ver­sion of myself that makes rea­so­na­ble and sen­si­ble deci­sions, more often than not. This rea­so­na­ble and sen­si­ble per­son, if he exis­ted, would pro­bably have ans­we­red, “No. Defi­ni­tely not.“
But none of this is sen­si­ble. None of it ever was. So yeah, kno­wing what I know now, I pro­bably wouldn’t have beha­ved any dif­fe­rently. I’m not proud of that; I’m not asha­med, either. It just is.
Was it worth the cost? Not really. It never is. Van Gough once told his brother, “No pain­ting ever sells for as much as it cost the artist to make it.” I’ve yet to meet in the flesh any artist who could prove him wrong.
Though loo­king on the bright side, it IS nice after years of strug­gling away in obs­cu­rity, to have a body of work that you’re actually proud of, one that [A] makes you a good living, [B] exceeds your ear­lier expec­ta­tions of what you thought you were capa­ble of achie­ving as a human being, and perhaps most impor­tantly, [C] has given a lot of other peo­ple a lot of joy and value.
When I was a kid in college, there very few ave­nues a car­too­nist could take, if she wished to be suc­cess­ful. There was no inter­net. There were only news­pa­pers, maga­zi­nes, books, TV, movies, comic books, merchan­di­sing, and little else. A world I find hard to ima­gine now, only a cou­ple of short deca­des later. And besi­des, I never saw my work as par­ti­cu­larly com­mer­cial, so even if I did give it my best shot, I never thought it would ever rea­lis­ti­cally pay off.
So in my last year of college, feig­ning matu­rity, I tur­ned my atten­tion to lan­ding a job that would pay my bills upon gra­dua­tion. From what I could then tell, wri­ting TV com­mer­cials see­med to use the same part of the brain it took to draw car­toons, and I wasn’t a bad car­too­nist, so I deci­ded to give Madi­son Ave­nue a go. It loo­ked like it could be inte­res­ting.
Somehow I mana­ged to get a job as an adver­ti­sing copyw­ri­ter, straight out of school. Some skill was nee­ded, most of it was luck, but when you’re in your early twen­ties and ente­ring the serious job mar­ket for the first time, you’ll take wha­te­ver you can get.
Though I was in the ad industry off-and-on for over a decade, I don’t think about it too much, now. Some part of me has blac­ked it out. Besi­des being VERY hard work, it wasn’t much fun. I was very much in the ranks of what I would call the “In-Betweenies” i.e. those good enough to get and keep a pretty well-paid posi­tion in an ad agency, but not good enough to really get ahead in it; not good enough to enjoy it pro­perly. This was the world I lived in, in 1998 New York, when I star­ted dra­wing the car­toons with a ven­geance. And like every other In-Betweenie my age, it was a tiring, stress­ful time for me.
[And then the inter­net hap­pe­ned…]
Over the next cou­ple of years, yes, I drew a lot of car­toons, but I didn’t do much with them. They were just a hobby. Besi­des, I had a lot going on at the time, with the job and the New York lifestyle to main­tain. Most of my car­toon audience back then con­sis­ted of fellow New York bar­flies that I had fois­ted them upon.
But all good things must come to an end. One day I found myself under-employed, broke and pis­sed off with life in gene­ral. With nothing bet­ter to do besi­des wai­ting for the phone to ring, in May, 2001 I star­ted my blog, gapingvoid.com.
I would like to say that the web­site took off soon after, the car­toons were a smash hit, and things impro­ved dra­ma­ti­cally right away, but sadly that didn’t hap­pen. I just kept at it, day after day, buil­ding it up slowly. That’s still how it hap­pens, for the most part.
The million-dollar con­tract has yet to arrive in the mail. That’s OK, somewhere along the line I figu­red how to make good money off of them, INDIRECTLY.
How? It’s pretty straight­for­ward, in retros­pect. I pos­ted the car­toons online, and because I had a lot of free time on my hands, I then spent a log time trac­king what hap­pe­ned to them, once they went out into the ether. This was 2002, just as blogs were begin­ning to hit the scene. This was the begin­ning of Google’s rise to the top of the search mar­ket. This was the era of Technorati.com, when peo­ple wan­ted to start seeing what was hap­pe­ning on the web RIGHT NOW, not just his­to­ri­cally.
Over the next year or two watching the car­toons tra­ve­ling about, watching what other blog­gers were up to, I star­ted get­ting a pretty good feel for how the inter­net ACTUALLY wor­ked, not just how the jour­na­lists and mar­ke­ting folk told peo­ple how it wor­ked. After a while I star­ted pos­ting my thoughts about this brave new world online. And after a while peo­ple star­ted e-mailing me, offe­ring to pay me good money if I would share more of what I had lear­ned online with them.
Sha­ring this infor­ma­tion for me was A LOT MORE FUN and bet­ter paid than trying to sell ads to clients, so hey, I went for it.
So far I’ve mana­ged to turn it into a pretty nice busi­ness. A lot more money, for a lot let stress and time than Madi­son Ave­nue ever offe­red me. Not a bad out­come.
The thing is, none of it hap­pe­ned on pur­pose. It just kinda sorta hap­pe­ned, one ran­dom event at a time.
I find having two strings to my bow, car­toons and inter­net, helps the busi­ness out a lot. I like to play them off each other. Sorry, I can’t draw you a car­toon; I’m too busy doing inter­net stuff. Sorry, I can’t help you with your inter­net pro­blem; I’m too busy dra­wing something for a client. I totally believe that if I gave one of them up for good, the other one would crash and burn over­night. It’s kee­ping the crea­tive ten­sion bet­ween the two, an exten­sion of the afo­re­men­tio­ned “Sex & Cash Theory”, that keeps things inte­res­ting. For both me and the good folk paying my bills.
I never inten­ded to be a pro­fes­sio­nal car­too­nist. I never inten­ded to become an inter­net joc­key. But somehow the two got mashed up to create this third thing. That’s what I mean by “If you are suc­cess­ful, it’ll never come from the direc­tion you pre­dic­ted.“
It’s good to be young and full of dreams. Dreams of one day doing something “insa­nely great”. Dreams of love, beauty, achie­ve­ment and con­tri­bu­tion. But unders­tand they have a life of their own, and they’re not very good at follo­wing ins­truc­tions. Love them, revere them, nur­ture them, res­pect them, but don’t ever become a slave to them. Other­wise you’ll kill them off pre­ma­tu­rely, before they get the chance to come true.
Good luck.

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15 Responses to “when your dreams become reality, they are no longer your dreams”

  1. I can tell you straight up now Hugh that your whole situa­tion in your ear­lier years sounds exactly like what I’m doing now. Things are steady, I work in adver­ti­sing / mar­ke­ting, it’s okay but not my pre­fe­rred path. I have these gran­diose expec­ta­tions of myself and my crea­ti­vity, I’m 50k words into my first novel, I blog about it, I’m wor­king hard at my full­time job to add that ‘extra bow,’ and I’m trying to main­tain ‘that lifestyle’ whilst floa­ting bet­ween Oxford and Lon­don.
    It’s all outs­tan­ding, it’s bri­lliant to see how it is all pos­si­ble, and espe­cially through this modern medium we call the social media, which I love, and hope will con­ti­nue to treat both me, and your­self well.
    As you say; Rock on. The future holds bright things, they’re often hard to get to, no one ever said it was going to be easy, but I believe the har­der you work, the luc­kier you get, and I plan on put­ting in the hours to get where I want to be.
    Thanks for your thoughts, and I look for­ward with bai­ted breath to the book.
    Rich

  2. Dreams are fuel for life. The big­ger the dreams the big­ger the life. They don’t always match up (almost never) but that wouldn’t be fun if we new where we were going.
    Thanks Hugh for sha­ring your dreams with us.

  3. Ben Rowe says:

    Hugh,
    That’s exactly the post I nee­ded to read this mor­ning. Thanks.
    Like Richard, I feel like I’m at the start of my path — and who knows where it will head. But anything’s pos­si­ble. You’ve pro­ved that.

  4. Great post, Hugh. Well writ­ten, engros­sing, and rele­vant, (and a little sweet). Would make a per­fect ending to a book… etc.

  5. Joaquin says:

    Or you could become a life coach.
    Seriously, since arri­ving at your blog 3 years ago through http://www.enriquedans.com, a Pro­fes­sor at a busi­ness school in Madrid (talk about ran­dom­ness), I´ve lear­ned a lot on how to detect bullshit (espe­cially my own) and lear­ning to set out to my true North.
    You´ve ins­pi­red me to put my ideas in car­toons too (I suck at dra­wing), and that unex­pec­ted turn matched with the idea of put­ting them on t-shirts, which is what I was ori­gi­nally set out to do.
    Of course, I´m nowhere near my own shore, but rea­ding this blog has hel­ped me set the true foun­da­tions for the ¨sex¨ part of my sch­tik. I guess that attests to point [C] of the bright side you men­tio­ned above.
    So thanks, once again.

  6. This smells char­mingly like the last chap­ter in “How To Be Crea­tive”. Touche!
    When you’ve rea­li­zed your dreams the only thing to do is to come up with new dreams. (Screen­play?) When I star­ted in the adver­ti­sing busi­ness the first thing I rea­li­zed was that I had tur­ned a hobby (wri­ting and dra­wing) into a busi­ness. It was no lon­ger fun.
    Who said I had to “feel” crea­tive at 9am in an office cubicle beside an express­way in Dallas?
    I didn’t.
    But like all good wor­king stiffs, at least I knew it wasn’t a steel fac­tory and that this job was bet­ter than a lot of peo­ple would ever have the chance to do – so I pro­cee­ded to churn out “pro­duct”, today called “con­tent” and then cherry-pick the best of it for my port­fo­lio.
    Who really thought that I had a deep crea­tive desire to find the underl­ying mea­ning and subt­le­ties in the Texas real estate and ban­king mar­kets? No one, fuck all. I was doing a job and I knew it. So I set about deve­lo­ping other hob­bies outside of the office.
    I lear­ned to shoot dove in West Texas (very near to you). I pic­ked up sai­ling on Cedar Creek lake from Pat Beck­man and his 25ft Cata­lina. I became Tower Records best cus­to­mer by weekly sto­king my collec­tion and I deve­lo­ped a ser­vi­cea­ble rea­ding jones at the hands of Hun­ter S. Thomp­son, Tom Rob­bins, Brau­ti­gan, Vone­gut, John Irving and the like.
    And life balan­ced out. I never had any mis­con­cep­tions that I was wri­ting the great Ame­ri­can novel aside from my work to hawk tooth­paste, laundry pow­der or video games. I married, bought a few hou­ses and became a wee­kend warrior on a 100 year-old money pit in Michi­gan.
    Life was good.
    Yet, like you, it was all ran­dom. The call to go top Korea was about as weird as I thought things were going to get – until two years later when I star­ted my own com­pany in that odd and fore­bo­ding foreign land.
    Ran­dom? But, not really.
    Over time I’ve just lear­ned to accept the twists and turns as gifts from above and make them work for me. To stay a per­pe­tual stu­dent and maybe, after time, to be able to teach others how to run the maze.
    The trick, I’ve found is in being able to decide, quickly and deci­si­vely, what it is you “do not” want to do. That skill will keep you from was­ting time on things that just aren’t going to work out any­way.
    Hugh, you say the busi­ness card car­toons have been going for ten years but I beg to dif­fer with you on that count. I can remem­ber as long as we have known each other, you wor­king with this for­mat. You really were doing it in the early 90s in Chi­cago, after UT. It’s what has kept us in con­tact all these years. When you first put up Gaping­void, I was on your mai­ling list.
    And then, this last year, when I finally got a real chunk of my book “Wild Wild East”, on the net, you were one of the first to res­pond and link me in. And that fue­led my current blog and got me into a weekly 3-post diet.
    Now, I’ve got wri­ting, dra­wing, blog­ging and mar­ke­ting all wor­king together in one of the oddest sympho­nies I ever could have ima­gi­ned.
    This week, I met an Ame­ri­can who works in the Inter­net industry and has moved to Viet­nam, who found me because of my blog. Next month, a woman from Sin­ga­pore will come to HCMC, who had also found me from my blog. Last Satur­day I had a date with a woman who has been a loyal rea­der and this Fri­day I will attend an industry func­tion and meet another woman who has been follo­wing the wri­ting.
    Niche, what niche?
    Okay, it’s not “Car­toons drawn on the back of busi­ness cards” but if “Smart-assed mar­ke­ting guy in the bowels of a com­mu­nist country” is a niche, I’ve got that baby sewn up!
    The Inter­net has given us pre­viously unde­fi­na­ble types the oppor­tu­nity, to, if not go mains­tream, go “slips­tream” into side­ways and pre­viously unchar­ted social mar­ke­ting and net­wor­king phi­lo­sophies that have pro­bably always exis­ted, but never had a reacha­ble plat­form.
    Being paid to be exactly who we are has got to be the ulti­mate reward and mea­sure of the word “suc­cess”.
    Million dollar checks don’t often come with that, but million dollar smi­les really do.
    Rock on, Hugh.

  7. aiza says:

    thank you very much for this. :D

  8. John says:

    Exce­llent.

  9. Here’s the latest on Viet­nam.
    http://wildwildeastdailies.blogspot.com/2008/06/vietnam-20-martin-sorrell.html
    My 2.0 may hap­pen yet…
    Please leave a com­ment on the post if you feel so inclined.

  10. Hugh,
    Espe­cially rele­vant to my situa­tion is your line about not beco­ming a slave to your dreams because doing so will force you to cut them off before they come true. I draw car­toons and post them on my blog, and lately I’ve felt frus­tra­ted because I’ve spent a lot of time on them, and I love doing so, but they’ve begun enc­roaching on other things I value in my life and I’ve come to the point where stop­ping the dra­wing for a while was an option. But I feel dif­fe­rently now after having read this post. You have a way of making it all seem pos­si­ble. Thanks for your bri­lliant wri­ting and I’m loo­king for­ward to your book.

  11. Paul says:

    Thanks Hugh,
    I stop here regu­larly and am NEVER disap­poin­ted.
    The qua­lity of your wri­ting is ins­pi­ra­tio­nal, what you write is ins­pi­ra­tio­nal, your suc­cess is ins­pi­ra­tio­nal.
    Bet you never thought you’d be an ins­pi­ra­tion uh??
    Or if that’s why you do it you’re suc­cee­ding!
    Ciao

  12. dronbo says:

    boro­no­del

  13. The car­toon on How to Make It As An Artist made me laugh…will send on to my artists friends!
    More seriously, you made a good point about how get­ting to where you are was a com­bi­na­tion of many indi­vi­dual steps, a bit of luck and good timing. Peo­ple think (and are sold on the idea) that suc­cess hap­pens over­night. Not true, more often than not.