April 3, 2007
random notes on being hugh
It’s been busy around here recently. Here are some random notes:
1. I’m single again. I’ll spare you the gruesome details [Sigh]. My father told me last recently, “You’re too old for girlfriends. You need a wife.” And one of my best friends told the me the same exact thing only yesterday. Yikes. [DATING TIP:] If you meet a cute girl on your travels, never give out your phone number. Just leave your e-mail address and your blog URL, if you have one. A bit more subtle etc.
2. I’m quite happy being in London for now, so long as “now” doesn’t last for too long. I’m thinking less than two years.
3. I have no idea where I’ll live after that. Probably Cumbria again. For a while I harbored ideas of moving back to the States, but, eh, as long as I get to travel there often, it’s easier for me to live over here.
4. It’s nice to no longer feel the need to live in New York again. I didn’t completely know I was over that, till I visited there three weeks ago. My first time back in seven, yes, seven years.
5. I would like to spend more time in Strathnaver one day [it’s the nearest thing I’ve got to a spiritual home], where my grandparents had their croft. Once you spend part of your childhood growing up on a croft, it’s hard to get it out of your blood.
6. More and more time is being spent doing what I do best i.e. cartoons and writing. I need the distractions of the big city less and less, it seems.
7. Five years of blogging later, I have learned this to be true: Traffic doesn’t matter. Being linked to by A-Listers matters even less. What matters most is building one’s network, one person at a time. As Adriana says, “The Network is mightier than The Node”.
8. Thomas is off to America in nine days, for his quarterly American trip. Usually around this time I say, “If anybody fancies a $4000 suit, feel free to send him an e-mail.” Not this time. Frankly, we’re too busy. We’ve not taken on any more UK customers for a while, and we’re VERY CLOSE to doing likewise with the US. It’s a small company, and there’s only so many orders we can handle. I guess it’s not a bad position to be in.
9. I have a very crafty plan with English Cut to expand into women’s suits. Frankly, the high-end choices currently offered to women are generally appalling, not mention, overpriced to the point of obscenity. I’m thinking a few Wall Street and City of London women would appreciate having the same conversation with English Cut, as we have going with our mostly male clientele.
10. In spite of what I just said about the sorry state of women’s suits, I am delighted to have learned recently that an old, long-lost Chicago friend of mine, Kevin Johnn [we lived across the hall from each other on Orleans & Chestnut St., way-back-when we were both starting out etc], is now a quite successful fashion designer in New York. Apparently he even had a stint at DKNY. In spite of my best efforts to contact him, I could not locate his e-mail address. If anyone knows how to reach him, please pass on my kind regards, and ask him to send me an e-mail for old time’s sake, Thanks.
11. In business, my number-one hero was always David Ogilvy. It seems I’m becoming more like him with every passing day. Scary. But in a good way.
12. In high school, David Ogilvy went to Fettes College in Edinburgh. Hamish, Bob and John also went there, some five decades later [They are three of my oldest, best friends in the world, Bob being also a very good friend of my other good friend, David Mackenzie. Bob is also the older brother of Jonathan, whose web-hosting company, Launchsite in Edinburgh, hosts gapingvoid, englishcut.com, stormhoek.com and getyourpeople.com]. I, sadly, went to the Edinburgh Academy instead. Hated every last minute of it. It wasn’t a bad school per se [he said, feigning generosity]; I just was never good at the Noble-Sons-of-The-Local-Parochial-Burgher-Establishment thing. Had I wanted a law degree, a nice, pink, plump wife from a good family, a brace of sons ALSO attending the Academy, a large flat in the New Town, AND a life spending my weekends in Kay’s Bar watching the rugby, the evenings waffling poetically on about the merits of certain single malt whiskies, I probably would have fared better there. Instead I befriended some Fettesians who didn’t much care for their school, either.
13. The rest, as they say, is history.
A nice pink plump wife, huh? I went to the sex convention this weekend and decided that a nice pink massaging glove would do the trick and be a perfect husband substitute. However, I know what your dad means. Somewhere out there a woman is also in need of a husband: look at it that way.
Oh and on the subject of tailoring: please guys, if you can make clothes that are tailored to our bodies, you will rake in millions. This is the one blind eye of the fashion industry. I’m telling ya … no two big Cuban butts are the same and neither should be their clothes.
I’m waiting …
Hugh, I’m sorry I missed you in NYC. You make a number of points here that I agree with, including the one about NYC (I live outside the city now). The suits idea is a good one, though I’m not a suit-wearer, I would like one, if it were girly. Most of them make you look like a soldier. THere’s no way a man would know a woman was under there…
Sorry about your break up, btw. Take care…
Personal relationships usually involve a LOT of compromise. More than most people really think about. If you’re not willing to compromise, she has to. That’s a hard order to fill: a 30+ year old professional woman who is willing to compromise enough to make a serious relationship work. If I was a single 35 year old, I wouldn’t turn my life around for anyone. But, I’m not single. I write at home as my job, so I’m flexible in that way. My life partner is a guy (I’m a woman) who is a real sweetheart and endures me when I get depressed. But we’re kind to each other also, and that helps a lot. Saying the wrong thing hurts more than most people realize.
Anyway, good luck and keep trying. It’s not easy to meet people these days, but if you look at it as a business venture, I’m sure you’ll make the right connections!
Since you have cited more spiritual things of late, I will share what 1 Cor 7:28 says (in part), “if you did marry, you would commit no sin…However, those who do will have tribulation in their flesh”. There is a sort of security in making the committment of marriage but we are all so imperfect, our relationships are fraught with pain & suffering.
I don’t imagine I could afford much more from English cut than the wonderful cashmere scarves, but truly a really nice suit is a hard thing to come by. And I think if I found one, I would find a way to get just one.
And for heaven’s sake don’t over analyze it. Make wise choices, yes. But that’s it. Love was not meant to be under a microscope, that’s what makes it so exciting.
Hmmm… Hmmm…
Unlike you I am a city rat and the bigger city, the better I feel, but if going to the country will bring more creativity you should do it ASAP!
I hope that you grew up and stopped censoring comments that are not brownnosing you. You write in point 7. above about building networks but it works both ways: if you p*ss people off then you build networks that are against you too.
Hey,
I have been following your blog for quite some time now. “How to be Creative” Stuff was amazing, most of my friends really liked it and thanks for that.
Reading your blog, I was thinking how things are so different in India, (I am from India), I guess here the only chance you get to go couple, is with your wife/hubby only. I hope that you too become a couple soon..
Cumbria??? Where abouts??? Being an “in the Lee of Skiddaw” lass and all!!
KT, we’re talking North Cumbria, in the Eden Valley, close-ish to Carlisle/Penrith.
“Most of them make you look like a soldier. THere’s no way a man would know a woman was under there…”
Oh, believe me, men know there’s a woman under my suits. One hell of a woman.
And Hugh, darling, there’s nothing wrong with a pink wife. On a sunny day, I’m quite pink and my hubby sure ain’t complaining (unless I’m cooking and then he has just cause).
About finding a companion, its all about the numbers baby. No, I don’t mean sleeping with half of the population, I mean meeting many, many, many women. I met thousands of guys before finding my hubby and when I met him (since I had thousands of guys to compare him to), I knew.
My Italian grandmother gave me advice on how to meet a good man. She told me to go outside and “wash windows” and he would drive by and see me, know that I was a good worker and marry me. I love my grandmother. She was nuts!
In regard to women suits. Ugh! I wear suits and have more shoes than god because “I have to”.
Please tell your designer friend to try and go for a feminine 40s kind of look. Sex sells in a “bored” room. However, I am so faux-metro sexual, it aint funny. I am old jeans, bare feet and some outrageous vintage t-shirt. My goal is to make enough money to be able to be “me” all the time.
Again, I do appreciate the little links to here and there. I have picked up some insightful thoughts that have already helped me move my business forward. If you are going to move somewhere make sure you still have internet hook-up. You are an unnatural resource to me.
Don’t worry, I am sure you will not have any trouble finding your next x-girlfriend.
Hi Hugh,
I’ve just launched Flirtnik, a small personals site for creatively-minded folk in the UK.
I can’t guarantee lurve — but I’d be interested to get your thoughts.
Tim
“What matters most is building one’s network, one person at a time. As Adriana says, “The Network is mightier than The Node”
Amen to that. I recently botched a migration of my own blog from LiveJournal to my own domain, in that I not only made Google drop its recollection of what was on that domain before, but I also made it look like my blog was a copy of my long-lived LiveJournal instead of vice versa, with the corresponding “duplicate content” penalty!
I writhed around with a crippled ego for a few days before I sat down and thought about what it *meant* to have a lower Google rank for a non-commercial blog, and realized: Nothing, really. By the time Google sees a post of mine it’s a few days old anyhow. The people coming in from Google aren’t the people that are giving me their time in advance, and are thus not the people I’m writing for.
So now I’m happily writing away for my existing audience, and hoping they’ll share things with their audiences that’ll get me more readers interested in what I’m writing, and so on. Much happier to think about it that way.
I don’t know anything about marketing and I wouldn’t know an A-lister if it feel on me. (Really, a sociologist could have a field day with this community…) Your cartoons are great, though. Sorry the girlfriend thing is proving such a trial. Here are a couple of things to get you started again. I read them somewhere on the web, and I’m sure I could find them again if you want to read the rest.
* Quality isn’t Job One. Being totally fucking amazing is Job One.
* At the center of every human soul is the intense longing to be closer to God. A boyfriend that can empathize with that is powerful.
* It’s all about thriving in markets that are smarter and faster than you are.
There is something to be said for the corner pub…
Aaahhh I know you are a wine bloke but the Oddfellows does a nice pint of Cragrat…
Displaying my ignorance in full force here… What’s a “Pink Wife” anyways? A nice, round, housewife?
Anyway, you sound like you have lots on your mind. I hope life leads you to a good love if you really want that.
“There is something to be said for the corner pub… ”
It’s where I met my husband but that’s a long story, lol.
Take Care,
Heather
[I’m wanted and not by the FBI]
If there’s one thing I’ve learned lately, is that every relationship is a manifestation of a lesson we need to learn. I agree with Kimber … one must kiss many frogs and so that must be the Incredible Hughness of Being.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go write about sex or something. Such a hypocrite I am!
Ok, back from my meeting, where I only pondered today’s gapingvoid cartoon.
Is the appendage worldy? Is one head and one eye all seeing and all knowing? Perhaps even spiritually connected to the universe. Hugh, is your penis god?
(Sorry, I was bored at the meeting) Don’t be mad.
Lurker here… I lurk but your last blog made me want to post!
Leave messages in books and random other places with your little comics… along with your email address and see who answers
So sorry to hear of the break-up. It’s going around…blogger buddies of mine here in the States are going thru break-ups left and right
The croft looks way cool..as long as it would have internet!
And not to diss your dad and friends, but don’t you need a girlfriend BEFORE you need a wife? I mean, what are you supposed to do? Pop round to ‘Wife’s R Us’??
I picked up this dating advice somewhere: Grow a mustache. Women are attracted to men with mustaches because they HATE mustaches… i.e. it gives them something about you that they can change.
You write in such a nice and friendly way that one feels touched.
I completely agree with what you have expressed in point 5 and 7.
“What matters most is building one’s network, one person at a time”
That’s it.
And for those moments when you think you’re all alone…visit my new site, a tribute to Internet dating hell…www.weirddatingmail.com…some really funny, weird stuff!
“I agree with Kimber … one must kiss many frogs and so that must be the Incredible Hughness of Being.”
Okay, if you’re kissing frogs, that might be the whole problem.
Those cross species relationships NEVER work out, trust me on that one.
and your last two point sort of ties into the first one, in an older but wiser kind of way
Manola — great comment: “If there’s one thing I’ve learned lately, is that every relationship is a manifestation of a lesson we need to learn” — 100% true… love it
“[DATING TIP:] If you meet a cute girl on your travels, never give out your phone number. Just leave your e-mail address and your blog URL, if you have one. A bit more subtle etc.” It’s a pity you don’t have any impressive business cards…
Kimber … you know now that I think about it … so very true! Better to kiss the prince directly, yes? (Except here in Miami the “frog” would be an iguana.)
Hugh, your note #9 link to English Cut needs fixing, it goes to EnglishCut.om.
This typo suggests you have a need for meditation and chanting the word om a bit. This will clear your head for more drawing.
As for note #1, needing a wife and too old to date: is Jack Nicholson to old to date? What’s good for others may not be the best thing for yourself.
Hey Big Fella — what happened to Antibes?
Hint: We still got great tapas (free) and great wine (€6 a bottle) and great weather.
We’ve also got lots of beautiful Spanish ladies (and if you’re that desperate, the local brothel is only 5km away — quite acceptable in Spanish culture) 1% English speakers but hey, you can’t have it all.
Or maybe you can…
Dennis, Antibes is still in the background. Not sure how I feel settling in a foreign country full-time, it’s that simple. Though if I could do a few months a year in Antibes, that would be very cool…
Waiting for Thingamy.com to get a bit more broken in before contemplating it, though…
With you bro’ — we spent 18 months agonising before making the leap. Despite all that planning it was really hard but worth it in the long run though. But there were 2 of us on a mission to create a new life.…
Moving to Spain has been a doddle in comparison. Happy to share the trials, tribulations and rewards one day.
You really shouldn’t be single. I’ve seen your picture; you’re too cute.
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