December 15, 2006

the driving in phoenix manifesto

Thanks, Alan, for this one. Too funny.

Driving in Phoenix Manifesto
1. We drive the temperature here, not the speed limit.
2. We have dedicated Left turn lanes, but don’t worry, they are great
places to catch up on the newspaper.
3. Since we have left turn lanes, blinkers, horns and lights are optional.
4. Only newbies and rookies use their horns, since we don’t use our turn
signals, no sense using anything else connected to the steering column.
5. The only exception to the horn rule is just before the sound of crashing.
6. If you are involved in a crash and the other person leaves, they are
illegal, have no drivers license or insurance and it’s their cousins car.
7. Your favorite store is always on the other side of town.
8. If the person in front of you has white hair, change lanes and
streets, they are snow birds, older than dirt, and have no idea where
they are.
9. The Accident report on the radio is always longer than the newscast.
10. Drivetime is quality time, use it wisely, it’s bedtime by the time
you get home.

alan herrell – the head lemur
raving lunacy
http://theheadlemur.typepad.com

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3 Responses to “the driving in phoenix manifesto”

  1. Thomas says:

    Too true, I hate the thought I’ll be down there over the holidays.

  2. Marti says:

    LOL! Too true! My in-laws lived there for a while, visiting was a nightmare!

  3. Christy says:

    Aww…I used to live there and want to move back – I’ll take the traffic over living in New Orleans.