January 10, 2006
top ten blogger lies
1. I don’t consider myself an A-Lister.
No, but I turn up for speaking gigs at all the big conferences anyway. Uh-huh.
2. I don’t care about traffic.
Of course I don’t. Even though I’m a freelance consultant, and my blog is my primary way of marketing myself. Rock on.
3. I’ve read your blog.
Yeah, well I read the “Musings of an unemployed tech consultant” bit on the title bar, before clicking off. That counts.
4. I started blogging back in 1999.
Of course, back in 1999 a Flash-animated, brochureware homepage was considered a blog. Kinda sorta.
5. My blog has no commercial agenda.
I’m far too sexy to care about money. Exactly.
6. I only have advertising on my blog as an experiment.
That explains why the adstrip is right under the “Musings of an unemployed tech consultant” bit. Indeed.
7. I’ve never liked the unegalitarian term, “A-Lister”.
Even though I am one. Oh, the irony.
8. I’m proud to be a D-Lister.
Even though I spend 7 hours a day writing the thing. Right.
9. He’s a big hero of mine.
He’s got more traffic than downtown Mexico City and I’m hoping to God he links to me one day.
10. I really admire what she’s doing for the blogosphere.
I’ve noticed that she’s currently single.
[Inspired by Mr. Kawasaki, of course.]
[BONUS LINK:] “Top Ten Reasons Why Nobody Reads Your Blog.”
Thank god we have blogs now! Now everyone can see what people have been posting on message boards/ usenet/BBS for 30 years. Oh what a remarkable shift in the paradigm. Finally a system that distributes information and what people think.
Top 10 Blogger Lies
Some are a bit tech related but I think in general it applies to a lot of us:
Top 10 Blogger Lies
2. I don’t care about traffic.
Of course I don’t. Even though I’m a freelance consultant, and my blog is my primary way of marketing…
Bitacoreros de primera e introducci
Steven Streight:
Please be nice. Thank you.
The Top Ten Blogger Lies
Here at Bare Feet, we're very bullish on blogging (um, some might even say annoying). We know that's it's a great tool for business development as well as personal growth. It enables us (and you) to get to know the people …
Si por eso la sala tiene espejos — porque a veces se v
Si por eso la sala tiene espejos — porque a veces se v
How True. I’d link to my blog but I had to take it down because the traffic was crashing the server.
How true!
HOOOCHIEEEEEEEMAMMAMAMAMAMAMAMAMMMAMAMMA
NUNANUNANANNANANANNANA!@1!!!!!!!!
HAAAAAIENNNNNNNNN HAAIIEEEEEEEENNN HAIEEEEEEEEEEN
This = unfunny. Good try though, champ. Try not to suck so hard next time.
What’s “traffic”?
You’ve been instalaunched! Which would make some bloggers buy all their buds a round of drinks. But you don’t care about mundane stuff about a link from the blogfaddah, huh?
I don’t care about my traffic. I don’t even check it, much less obsess about arbitrary milestones:
http://theargumentclinic.blogspot.com/2006/01/10000-visitors-woohoo.html
Re: #4 — What’s wrong with that? Personally, I’ve been making fun of morons on my blog since 1942.
Come to my site. I’m all about the money and I have only been blogging two weeks.
I spend eight hours a day so no one will visit.
Thus, I do it anyway because it pleases me. Am I self-promoting, sure. Why not? No one else is going to sing my praises but me.
No ads today. We will see if I want them tomorrow. I can change my mind.
Truth be told, in 1999 I was still doing Usenet, and under a different nickname.
Well, my blogger archives only go back to Jan 2000, but I was using another platform before that. Honest.
Cool site, I actually looked at the main page. You’re onto something with the graphics. I esp. like the cartoons. I’m surprised more blogs don’t exploit the one pic is worth 1000 words lever.
#11 Keep telling yourself the blog experience enhances the day-job bottom line.
My top 5 lies:
1. Cool blog…
I haven’t actually read your cool blog, I am here promoting mine…
2. My blog is NSW
That always attracts traffic, and it might actually be true… I could be from New South Wales…
3. Let’s find as many ways to link to my blog as humanlyhumanly…
Thank God for cut-and paste…
4. My blog really is NSW, but I won’t tell them…
It’s always fun imagining people at work, clicking furiously to get rid of pop-ups as their boss is passing by…
5. I am a girl and I am naked…
That always works…
Hitchikers guide to blogging
I tried blogging because I thought I had something to say. At the end of my first week of blogging I’d learned, to my chagrin, that I had little left to say (that is, I’d found my self to be too shallow a well) and that others had already said it more fulsomely and better.
Now I can admire the fortitude of the established blogger and empathize with the less visited ones. (now, lwt me re-trace the links that got me to this obscure place…ta! )
Hugh,
Thanks for the link! I love your lies! Can you send me an email? I’d like to ask you something.
Thanks,
Guy
Best blog post ever
Jeneane Sessum writes “The Top Ten Lies of Blogging Consultants.” Excellent list. Hugh MacLeod has <a href=“http://www.gapingvoid.com/Moveable_Ty…
Very amusing and right on the money,
The Exclusive Interweb
Hugh MacLeod is on a tear about blogging. Creating one punchy top ten list after another, and now the two immutable laws of blogging. A return to discussion of blogging for blogging’s stake, since he’s been away attending to suits and wine.…
Every blogger should read this, thanks for posting it.
I’ve read your blog and I find it great — head on over to our blog at http://www.touchstonegadget.com/blog for fun!
Haha just kidding — I love the post — I have linked to your post as well (in the hope, of course, of getting more traffic from your blog!)
I didn’t bother to read these.
OMG PLZ DO NOT LOOK AT THIS MYSPACE PROFILE
http://myspace.com/j0ey69
Google vs. Feds and my selection of web news…
Here is a very detailed account in ‘Fed vs. Google’ case: Bush Administration Demands Search Data; Google Says No; AOL, MSN & Yahoo Said Yes… See related writings: Subpoena Resistance Hurts Google Stock
‘Google as the guardian of our…
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