January 10, 2006

top ten blogger lies

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1. I don’t con­si­der myself an A-Lister.
No, but I turn up for spea­king gigs at all the big con­fe­ren­ces any­way. Uh-huh.
2. I don’t care about traf­fic.
Of course I don’t. Even though I’m a free­lance con­sul­tant, and my blog is my pri­mary way of mar­ke­ting myself. Rock on.
3. I’ve read your blog.
Yeah, well I read the “Musings of an unem­plo­yed tech con­sul­tant” bit on the title bar, before clic­king off. That counts.
4. I star­ted blog­ging back in 1999.
Of course, back in 1999 a Flash-animated, brochu­re­ware home­page was con­si­de­red a blog. Kinda sorta.
5. My blog has no com­mer­cial agenda.
I’m far too sexy to care about money. Exactly.
6. I only have adver­ti­sing on my blog as an expe­ri­ment.
That explains why the ads­trip is right under the “Musings of an unem­plo­yed tech con­sul­tant” bit. Indeed.
7. I’ve never liked the une­ga­li­ta­rian term, “A-Lister”.
Even though I am one. Oh, the irony.
8. I’m proud to be a D-Lister.
Even though I spend 7 hours a day wri­ting the thing. Right.
9. He’s a big hero of mine.
He’s got more traf­fic than down­town Mexico City and I’m hoping to God he links to me one day.
10. I really admire what she’s doing for the blo­gosphere.
I’ve noti­ced that she’s currently sin­gle.
[Ins­pi­red by Mr. Kawa­saki, of course.]
[BONUS LINK:] “Top Ten Rea­sons Why Nobody Reads Your Blog.”

82 Responses to “top ten blogger lies”

  1. Mal4242 says:

    Thank god we have blogs now! Now ever­yone can see what peo­ple have been pos­ting on mes­sage boards/ usenet/BBS for 30 years. Oh what a remar­ka­ble shift in the para­digm. Finally a sys­tem that dis­tri­bu­tes infor­ma­tion and what peo­ple think.

  2. Top 10 Blog­ger Lies

    Some are a bit tech rela­ted but I think in gene­ral it applies to a lot of us:
    Top 10 Blog­ger Lies
    2. I don’t care about traf­fic.
    Of course I don’t. Even though I’m a free­lance con­sul­tant, and my blog is my pri­mary way of marketing…

  3. Bita­co­re­ros de pri­mera e introducci

  4. hugh macleod says:

    Ste­ven Streight:
    Please be nice. Thank you.

  5. The Top Ten Blog­ger Lies

    Here at Bare Feet, we're very bullish on blog­ging (um, some might even say anno­ying).  We know that's it's a great tool for busi­ness deve­lop­ment as well as per­so­nal growth.  It ena­bles us (and you) to get to know the people …

  6. zoom says:

    Si por eso la sala tiene espe­jos — por­que a veces se v

  7. bdsv says:

    Si por eso la sala tiene espe­jos — por­que a veces se v

  8. Jonski says:

    How True. I’d link to my blog but I had to take it down because the traf­fic was crashing the ser­ver. ;)

  9. T_AND_HOOCH says:

    HOOOCHIEEEEEEEMAMMAMAMAMAMAMAMAMMMAMAMMA
    NUNANUNANANNANANANNANA!@1!!!!!!!!
    HAAAAAIENNNNNNNNN HAAIIEEEEEEEENNN HAIEEEEEEEEEEN

  10. 7b says:

    This = unfunny. Good try though, champ. Try not to suck so hard next time.

  11. TmjUtah says:

    What’s “traf­fic”?

  12. terri says:

    You’ve been ins­ta­launched! Which would make some blog­gers buy all their buds a round of drinks. But you don’t care about mun­dane stuff about a link from the blog­fad­dah, huh?

  13. Robert says:

    I don’t care about my traf­fic. I don’t even check it, much less obsess about arbi­trary miles­to­nes:
    http://theargumentclinic.blogspot.com/2006/01/10000-visitors-woohoo.html

  14. Stephen says:

    Re: #4 — What’s wrong with that? Per­so­nally, I’ve been making fun of morons on my blog since 1942.

  15. newscoma says:

    Come to my site. I’m all about the money and I have only been blog­ging two weeks.
    I spend eight hours a day so no one will visit.
    Thus, I do it any­way because it plea­ses me. Am I self-promoting, sure. Why not? No one else is going to sing my prai­ses but me.
    No ads today. We will see if I want them tomo­rrow. I can change my mind.

  16. triticale says:

    Truth be told, in 1999 I was still doing Use­net, and under a dif­fe­rent nickname.

  17. joma says:

    Well, my blog­ger archi­ves only go back to Jan 2000, but I was using another plat­form before that. Honest.

  18. Horst Graben says:

    Cool site, I actually loo­ked at the main page. You’re onto something with the graphics. I esp. like the car­toons. I’m sur­pri­sed more blogs don’t exploit the one pic is worth 1000 words lever.
    #11 Keep telling your­self the blog expe­rience enhan­ces the day-job bot­tom line.

  19. Sonia Belle says:

    My top 5 lies:
    1. Cool blog…
    I haven’t actually read your cool blog, I am here pro­mo­ting mine…
    2. My blog is NSW
    That always attracts traf­fic, and it might actually be true… I could be from New South Wales…
    3. Let’s find as many ways to link to my blog as humanlyhumanly…
    Thank God for cut-and paste…
    4. My blog really is NSW, but I won’t tell them…
    It’s always fun ima­gi­ning peo­ple at work, clic­king furiously to get rid of pop-ups as their boss is pas­sing by…
    5. I am a girl and I am naked…
    That always works…

  20. Thomas Hazlewood says:

    I tried blog­ging because I thought I had something to say. At the end of my first week of blog­ging I’d lear­ned, to my cha­grin, that I had little left to say (that is, I’d found my self to be too sha­llow a well) and that others had already said it more ful­so­mely and bet­ter.
    Now I can admire the for­ti­tude of the esta­blished blog­ger and empathize with the less visi­ted ones. (now, lwt me re-trace the links that got me to this obs­cure place…ta! )

  21. Guy Kawasaki says:

    Hugh,
    Thanks for the link! I love your lies! Can you send me an email? I’d like to ask you something.
    Thanks,
    Guy

  22. BlogWorks says:

    Best blog post ever

    Jeneane Ses­sum wri­tes “The Top Ten Lies of Blog­ging Con­sul­tants.” Exce­llent list. Hugh Mac­Leod has <a href=“http://www.gapingvoid.com/Moveable_Ty…

  23. Very amu­sing and right on the money,

  24. The Exc­lu­sive Interweb

    Hugh Mac­Leod is on a tear about blog­ging. Crea­ting one punchy top ten list after another, and now the two immu­ta­ble laws of blog­ging. A return to dis­cus­sion of blog­ging for blogging’s stake, since he’s been away atten­ding to suits and wine.…

  25. Every blog­ger should read this, thanks for pos­ting it.

  26. I’ve read your blog and I find it great — head on over to our blog at http://www.touchstonegadget.com/blog for fun!
    Haha just kid­ding — I love the post — I have lin­ked to your post as well (in the hope, of course, of get­ting more traf­fic from your blog!)

  27. Automatt says:

    I didn’t bother to read these.

  28. joe says:

    OMG PLZ DO NOT LOOK AT THIS MYSPACE PROFILE
    http://myspace.com/j0ey69

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