April 30, 2005
twentysomething male fantasy movies

My favorite “film chick”, Cynthia Rockwell writes wonderfully about “Twentysomething male fantasy movies.“
I
Hugh MacLeod
Cartoons drawn on the back of business cards
April 30, 2005

My favorite “film chick”, Cynthia Rockwell writes wonderfully about “Twentysomething male fantasy movies.“
I
April 29, 2005
Both Focused Performance and gapingvoid were mentioned today over at Fast Company for this whole culture vs. technology thing:
The respective entries — and the comments they’ve attracted so far — resonate well with the May issue’s cover story: Change or Die. As part of a wide-ranging analysis of how people are wired in terms of change, John Kotter, a Harvard Business School professor, offers, “The central issue is never strategy, structure, culture, or systems. The core of the matter is always about changing the behavior of people.”
Thanks for the mention, Heath.

Agree/Disagree?
Doc Searls’ slides from his closing keynote speech in Paris last Monday.
Interesting stuff, as always.
[BONUS LINK:] Neville Hobson wrote a great synopsis about what went down in Paris.
Sig continues the cultural v technological debate:
So makeshift solutions were invented, revived and refined to get back a certain air of balance. Marketing, distribution, retail, inventories, selling, push, push — and yes, management and hierarchies.
All makeshift solutions. Empty beer crates on top of each other.
And, tata, we now have the much needed ‘interaction technology’ aka IT!
But the makeshift solutions will not budge. Hmm.
There you are, in my mind: We elevated temporary solutions into truths and we use IT as duct tape to prop up the rickety tower of empty beer crates.
We all know it’s shit but our boss tells us we still have x-units to sell by year’s end. Lucky us.
[HAMISH IN THE COMMENTS:]
Answer: get longer term management, or make the solutions much easier to change.
The issue with the second is not the IT itself in general, but returning to the cultural debate in the earlier posts, the internal friction in making these changes in the organisation is the biggest barrier.
There can be no technological solution without a cultural solution. Cultural solutions are more valuable and profitable than technological solutions.
This got me thinking to a recent conversation I had with the Chief Marketing Officer of probably the most respected and “creative” ad agency on the planet. He told me:
Our best ideas no longer come from the copywriters. They’re coming from the techies.
Hope you’re not a copywriter.
Marketing and advertising has always been pretty peripheral to the core business. They’ll need to find ways to operate deeper within the origanisation if they’re going to survive.

When talking about tech, I always think back to Fred Wilson’s great line (to paraphrase):
Stop looking for the next big thing. Think of ways to solve problems. That’s the way to make money in tech.
Here’s a problem I think would be pretty interesting to solve:
Tom Peters has written about a future scenario where multi-billion dollar corporations are successfully run with only seven employees.
I assume everything would be farmed out to “A Loose Confederation of Skunkworks”. Groovy.
OK, so what would be the glue holding the confederation together? Money? Tech? Conversation? Love? Fellowship? Meaning? Greed? Lust? Fear?
(I don’t know about you, but greed, lust and fear has always worked for me.)
Based on the writings and of Seth Godin, I coined a wee phrase today, “The Siv”. Short for “The Story-Idea Virus”.
The Siv needs three things:
1. The Story. It’s got to tell a story.
2. The Idea. It’s got to have an idea.
3. The Virus. People have got to want to tell it/spread it. It needs to be inherently viral.
The Story is the lie. The Idea is the truth. Both need The Virus to survive. All three need each other.
I’m working on “Siv Theory” as we speak, with one of my clients– a wine company. Turning wine bottles into Sivs. Creating brands cheaper, faster and better than the next guy.
It’s a living.
I’m not happy with the “How To Be Creative” book proposal. I’ll be posting a revised one soon.
Just so you know…
April 28, 2005
Sig comments on the “technology vs culture” thingumy:
Software in general represents/is a model of the real world.
And enterprise software is a bit particular in that it models some other model: Management theories, marketing, hierarchies and a few others. Accounting software is conceptually built for how it’s done in the finance department, CRM is built to support the current (and old) ways of the marketing department and so on.
What then if the model the model is based upon is wrong? Would then not the software-cementing-culture be highly unproductive, even inhuman?
Time to revisit the underlying models I say. Let the technology solutions follow.
This would explain why Sig’s company is also called “Thingumy”. Anyway, so I’m having a good ol’ time trying to figure out what I’m doing in the “Middleware” market, besides looking rather confused.
[NOTE TO SELF:] Stick to cartooning. This is so out of your league.
A recent thought:
There can be no technological solution without a cultural solution. Cultural solutions are more valuable and profitable than technological solutions.
Agree/Disagree?
[Random Question to The Scobleizer:] Hey Robert, what big cultural problem is Microsoft trying to solve these days? Just curious.
[SYMBIOSIS:] You can’t build a Trojan Horse without Trojans. The Greeks may be signing your paycheck, but the Trojans are also your friends.
[NOTE TO SELF:] Morph technological products into cultural products, and vice versa?
Good point by Thom Lawrence in the comments of the previous post:
This is, more or less, the central theme of all software development best-practice since time began. Procedures, Modules, Objects, Components, Services… MacGuffins of all sorts have yet to resemble the silver bullet you’re after. All of these tools are just to defend against uncertainty and change.
But it’s not really a product you can sell. You can’t have your cake made out of completely incompatible ingredients, sprinkle on magic middleware dust and eat it.
Infrastructure has to be a first class citizen in your business, right from the start. People _know_ how to build these systems. People are already building them. It’s just a matter of commitment and stamina.
Technologists versus culturalists again?
A while back I wrote a thing about technologists vs culturalists. So I suppose you can’t build “Skunkworks” software and hope to sell it at a profit, unless you already have a “Skunkworks” culture ready and willing to use it.
[NOTE TO SELF:] Greed kills skunks. There can be no technological solution without a cultural solution. Cultural solutions are more valuable and profitable than technological solutions.
[NOTE TO SELF:] Stick to cartooning. You are so out of your league.

Hamish writes about Middleware:
The problem is that Oracle is trying to rebuild the foundation whilst not alarming the people who are living in the house. Basically, it doesn
April 27, 2005

The cartoon above, “A Loose Confederation” is one of my faves I’ve done over the last year or so. The thing is, I never quite understand why that is. I just like it.
I’m no business or software expert, so pardon me if this sounds a bit naive, but…
Let’s just imagine big business moved away from a hierarchy model, what Doc Searls calls an “Egology”, into what Jon Husband calls a “Wirearchy”.
How would that affect business software? How would a company like SAP survive?
I have no idea, to be honest. Software isn’t my game at all. I’m hoping Hamish will help me answer this one. Maybe Doc Searls as well. Or Mary Hodder. Or Euan Semple.
[NOTE TO SELF:] The Hughtrain is getting a bit long in the tooth. It needs a rewrite.
[BONUS LINK:] Mary Hodder kvetches about the panel format in Paris over the weekend.
Proposed:
1. Ditch the panels.
2. One leader per room.. moderating an active discussion by everyone in the room by, asking questions and interacting.
3. IF we do panels, any time there are more people lined up at the mic, than are on the panel, the panel and the people at the mic have to switch places.
Please note, I do appreciate all the work that goes in to making a conference like this, and thank the people who put it on. But they are doing a format we all have done for a long time. And we need a change. This doesn’t work, and it needs to stop.
I sent her the following e-mail:
I hear what you’re saying about panels, though I think they provide a good enough focus/locus… Some of my best moments were the impromptu, like going off outside and having a cigarette and striking up a conversation…
I would say the luncheon the day before was the highlight of my trip. A confab of eight or so. And there were one or two stolen moments I shall remember for a while.
I hear what Mary’s saying, certainly, but I’ve not been to many of these things, so it was still all new and fun for me. I sort of looked at the panels much like the Sun, with all these interesting little planets orbiting around. The aforementioned luncheon being a good example of a “planet”. But so was sharing a cigarette with Alistair Shrimpton or Nev Hobson. Or meeting Sig Rinde.
I think the panel’s job is to keep the planets revolving in place around it. Anything else (e.g. mind-blowing insights coming down off the stage etc) is just a bonus.
The t-shirts will be going live on the official launch date, Tuesday, the 3rd of May. Just under a week.
Everything seems to be working fine and on schedule.
April 26, 2005
Just got back from a wonderful weekend in Paris.
Too tired to write about it right this minute…
Here’s a nice picture of Thomas and I, taken by Doc Searls.
April 23, 2005

Off to Paris. Back Tuesday. See you soonish.
[NOTE TO SELF:] Write less. Post more cartoons.
[SUNDAY UPDATE:] In Montparnasse, Paris, typing from my favorite cybercafe, the one around the corner from my usual hotel. Paris hasn’t changed much since I was here last November. Having dinner tonight with lots of bloggers etc.
[SUNDAY UPDATE– NOON:] It’s weird reading Doc Searl’s blog, realising you’re about to go meet him in person for the first time in about 20 minutes… Brunch at Cafe Select on the Boulevard Montaparnasse, along with Mary Hodder, Halley Suitt and Caterina Fake.
[MONDAY UPDATE:] Still in Paris. About to go catch my plane. The conference was fun. Drew some cartoons while I was there, which Heiko posted (Thanks, Heiko!).
Great to see everybody… will blog about it later.
Special thanks to Loic Lemeur and his posse for making it happen.
(Some good Technorati links here)
There a was session there where journalists were asking a lot of questions. I came away thinking, “Dinosaurs don’t like meteors”. There is no point trying to sell a dinosaur a meteor. He/She ain’t buying, so stop trying to sell him/her the meteor story etc.
April 22, 2005

Rich Segal has a lucid post about how to fix Microsoft: Make it as reliable as dialtone.
Robert Scoble wants Microsoft to make products that thrill people. Perhaps making Microsoft as reliable as dialtone would be thrills enough for most people?
Yesterday I said that Skype thrills me more than anything Microsoft makes, which is basically true. Having spent a lot of time on both sides of the Atlantic (over 15 years total on each) I’ve given a lot of money to phone companies over the years. So of course a viable internet alternative would please me greatly.
That being said, gapingvoid for the most part was all typed in on my trusty Dell computer, which is powered by Windows 98. MS played a key part in building the most important medium in my life (besides cartoons) and yet, I call myself unthrilled. I should love them more, but I don’t.
But that’s the price you pay when you become a monopoly. People start taking you for granted. You just become part of the background noise, like the phone company or Commonwealth Edison.
I’ll say the same thing to Microsoft that I said to McDonald’s seven years ago: You want people to love you again? Then get hungry again.
“Blog or Die”, Robert? How about “Hunger or Die”?
[PS: McDonald’s didn’t take my advice. Instead they spent x-hundred million on the heartbreakingly uninspired and formulaic “Did somebody say McDonald’s” campaign.]

I’m off to Paris tomorrow for the big “Les Blogs” conference on Monday.
Hanging out with Doc Searls on Sunday. And hopefully Halley Suitt.
Seeing a friend Saturday night.
Heading back home on Tuesday morning.
Tom’s coming with me, though sadly he’ll be missing the conference. Too many French customers to look after.
It’s not a bad business model we’ve set up there: Go to Paris once a month for a long weekend. Stay at nice hotel. Make some money. Easy, fun, profitable and… it’s Paris. Hurrah!
English Cut was given a wee mention last night on CNN’s Global Office. Tom and I were down in London last week, and CNN came along to Savile Row and interviewed Tom for about 20 minutes. I think about 15 seconds of that ended up on the screen, but happily for publicity whores everywhere, “EnglishCut.com” was clearly legible throughout.
The story was about how blogs are changing business. Alistaire Shrimpton (of Six Apart UK) was also interviewed. As soon as I have a link, I’ll post it.
April 21, 2005
Hamish writes about his recent trip to Moscow:
I walked from my hotel to the Kremlin, along the Moscow river. Got to Red Square, and it was cordoned off, I guess they were getting ready for some kind of state celebration, like “Celebration of Tractors in Space Five Year Production Planning Heros” day, or somesuch.
The guards who stopped me laughed, when I asked if I could go in, and said the only thing in English that they seemed to want to. “Twenty dollars.” They laughed, and I laughed, and I wonder how serious they were. Not sure that all Red Square guards are elite guards, but sure as hell I have no idea about the delicate etiquette of bribing them.

Robert Scoble’s boss just left Microsoft to go work at Skype. Scoble talks about the implications, and a very good job he does of it too:
But, now the technology industry needs to focus extra hard on thrilling customers. Microsoft has a lot of work to do before it does that. That was Lenn’s final challenge as he walked out the door. Thrill customers or else they’ll go elsewhere. And quickly. It isn’t lost on me that his new company has had 100 million downloads in 18 months, spending only $.04 to get each. I’m hearing that one of their VoIP competitors is spending $400 to “acquire” one customer.
My employee morale will go up a lot when we start shipping products that thrill customers. There’s nothing better than meeting people in the airport who thank you for doing stuff that makes their lives better.
I agree, Robert. Skype thrills me more than anything Microsoft makes. And it sounds like your former boss concurs.
“Thrilling customers” is a terrifiic idea. Seriously. But it’s not enough for your bosses to give you permission to try. They also have to be genuinely determined to make it happen. There’s no point of a lieutenant firing up the troops if the generals are napping etc.
How genuinely determined are they, Robert, just out of interest?
PS: Who’s Bill Gates’ tailor?

The t-shirt sales are trundling along nicely. I’m actually surprised they’ve sold this well. I think the real test only begins once the shirts are actually made, shipped, and people start wearing them and blogging about them.
As of 0930 GMT today:
HUGHTRAIN: 44
GOOD FOR YOU: 28
MISTAKENLY: 30
CFA: 21
TOTAL: 123 SOLD
(677 LEFT)
Of course, the thought occurs to me: if people don’t like them/hate them/feel ripped off, I am frickin’ dead. Which is why I went for the high-quality option, even if it drove the price up higher than some of my readers are used to paying [European Prices + Weak U.S. Dollar = Bad Combo.].
My great, great grandfather, Grampa Simmons, had a fairly successful department store in St Louis back in the early 1900s. His famous line (still quoted today) was, “People remember the quality long after they’ve forgotten the price.“
Amen.
April 20, 2005

Heh. Technorati passed the nine million mark a little while back.
So that means nine million blogs, plus any others not registered by them.
A total population roughly equal to London or New York.
A year ago the number was two million. At this rate, by next year we might be seeing numbers like fifty or sixty million. The population of England or France. And a year or two after that, perhaps a population equal to the the US or Russia. Yeah, I know, I’m getting carried here, but hey…
What does this mean for you and your business? I have no idea. Depends on what your business is. It depends on what level you wish to engage other people.
As a marketing tool, my gut instinct tells me that with blogs, the more expensive, molecular, “niche” and/or “bespoke” your product is, the better.
Agree/Disagree?
April 19, 2005
In its first 24 hours, gapingvoid sold 100 t-shirts plus 8 subscriptions. Not bad at all, considering the site is only in pre-order mode.
No, I don’t expect this pace to continue. If it drops off 50% in the next 24 hours it won’t surprise me. However, I also suspect subscriptions will start trickling in quite steadily once people have started receiving the shirts and talking about them; once people know they aren’t duds etc.
A hundred t-shirts on the first day. That seems like a lot to me.
Today is the three month anniversary of English Cut going live.
On one level it’s just flown by. On another level, a lot has happened.

Here are my thoughts on the t-shirts since they launched roughly 24 hours ago.
So far we’ve sold 81 shirts and 6 subscriptions. Not bad at all. Thanks to everyone who bought one. Seriously, it made my day.
I think we would have sold more had the weak Dollar not made them so darn expensive for the American buyers. Notice how all the kvetching about the price earlier was all people quoting in Dollars, not Pounds Sterling or Euros? I thought that was very telling.
A “designer” tee in the UK retails around the
April 17, 2005

The T-shirt site is up and live.
The shirts won’t be ready to ship until May 3rd, so the site’s just in pre-order mode. But we should have photographs of the shirts by the end of the week.
The long delay is due to the gapingvoid collar labels, which take forever to order. But I wanted them in the equation, as opposed to the usual Fruit of the Loom/Hanes ones etc.
Secondly, my other projects got insanely busy in the last few weeks.
Just a lot of little things just kept adding up. Sorry about that.
One more time, here are the basics:
1. The shirts will be limited edition of 4 designs, 200 of each. I won’t reprint a design once it’s sold out. Once they’re gone, they’re gone. Nor will I be printing any new designs till one of the existing ones is sold out. So there will never be more than 4 designs i.e. never more than 800 shirts available at any one time.
2. There will be a subscription service. People who want to collect all the designs can sign up for it, and each time a new design is issued, we’ll send it to you. The price will automatically be deducted from your credit card as the new designs become available, and you can cancel at any time. This service is limited to 100 subscribers, first come, first serve.
All this is explained on the website, of course.
Again, sorry for any delays, but it’s been a really busy time for me.
Hope you like. Let me know your thoughts. Thanks.

Recently on gapingvoid we all started talking about what comes after Cluetrain.
There was all kinds of great possible answers: Markets are relationships, markets are collaborations etc etc.
I think it’s actually far simpler than that.
What comes after Cluetrain? Answer: Making money with Cluetrain.
Everybody wants the new theory. I just want the cash.
April 15, 2005

Doc Searls says in the comments of a recent gapingvoid post:
By the way, the next step after Cluetrain, IMHO, is Markets are Relationships.
You heard it here first. Or maybe you heard it somewhere else first. Whatever.
Doc and I are meeting in Paris next week. Hurrah!
Doc and I are talking about collaborating to create some Cluetrain/Hughtrain hybrid.
So we have “Markets are relationships” meets “The market for something to believe in is infinite”…
Add those two together and you get…?
I’m trying to think of possible answers. If you have any ideas, please leave them in the comments. Thanks.
[NOTE TO SELF:] Maybe The Hughtrain needs to be Open Source. Maybe I need to build The Hughtrain Wiki…?

This made my day. From Thom Lawrence:
It’s interesting that there’s a bit of a backlash over at gapingvoid. The whole English Cut thing has to stand as the best example of Cluetrain-style thinking actually bringing in the Houblons. And Hugh’s done a great job helping Thomas get the word out. But some of the calmer posters in that thread are right — it’s not news anymore, and it’s getting a bit stale.
I suppose what’s happened is this:Cluetrain works.
What’s next?Took the dinosaurs thousands of years to die out, and the mammals millions of years to get to the moon. I imagine the interregnum was largely like this: a lot of opposable-thumb-pointing but not much progress.
In the comments I reply:
Heh. I actually agree with you.
Still, it follows a pattern.
I write about something and it takes over my life. Then it gets old. Then I find something new to write about.
This happened with “How To Be Creative”, “The Hughtrain” and now English Cut.
Usually when I’ve been overdosing on a subject, the best cure is just to spend more time drawing cartoons. It clears the head pretty effectively.
Thanks for the feedback =)
“Cluetrain works. What’s next?” Exactly.
April 12, 2005

Tom got back from New York yesterday and we’ve been scrambling like crazy ever since to keep up with events as they occur.
I’m feeling really fried. But in a good way.
Sorry to everybody who wonders what weird drug I’ve been on lately. I’ll try to get back to normal by the end of the week. Promise!
April 11, 2005

Still in London, about to catch the train back home, so will be writing more later in the day. But here’s what’s on my radar screen:
1. Tom and English Cut had a very, very good New York trip. That is official. Once I speak to Tom again I’ll find out what the final tally is… but it was without question his most sucessful New York trip ever, by a long shot. He’s over the Atlantic at the moment, flying home.
We were expecting to return to NY after 3 months, July-August etc. We might have to make it much sooner. We seem to be on a roll with the NY thing, so why not? We’ll go anywhere the customers are, basically.
David Parmet, English Cut’s PR chap in New York was, of course, instrumental in making the trip as successful as it was. If you want the cutting-edge of how blogs are affecting the PR indusustry, he’s definitely the guy to talk to.
2. The t-shirt website is just about ready to go… tick tick tick…
Had I not had to come down to London on business, the thing would’ve been up by now. But hey, these things happen.
3. I am way too busy all of a sudden. I am so glad I live in the boonies. If I had a big-city lifestyle to maintain on top of everything else, I think my head would fry like butter.
April 8, 2005

I’m in London for the weekend. Blogging light for the next 48 hours.
[ALSO:] The t-shirt website is JUST about up. A couple of tweaks over the weekend, and it should be ready to go.
Man, I am busy these days…
April 7, 2005

Just spoke to Tom on his mobile. He’s in Manhattan, safe and sound. Hurrah!
Give him a call if you fancy meeting up and/or a new bespoke Savile Row suit etc.
Thanks.
[Big Scandal:] True Talk exposes English Cut for the ripoff artists that Thomas and I undoubtedly are!
What, so you want a pat on the back for occasionally not sucking?
Where do you think you are, Madison Avenue?

Thanks, Brian, fot the lovely post. I hope you won’t begrudge me posting it here in its entirety:
How Does Your Global Microbrand Grow?
Take one savvy tailor in the UK. Niche the offering. Niche it again. Mix one manic, disaffected dreamer as marketing instigator. Fold one open-to-happenstance PR type in NYC. Drop crumbs along the way.
Yield one midnight reader/writer in Louisiana, who, against all odds, knows the value offered by said English tailor, who only a few months ago made the counter-intuitive move to take to the IntarWeb.
Flatearth? I’d call it NowTime.
The Hughtrain was all about advertising and branding. As I was holding down an advertising job when I wrote it, that’s not surprising.
“Post-Hughtrain” is slightly different. Post-Hughtrain is all about building what I call a “Global Microbrand”.
Three things things triggered this evolution.
1. The bitter emptiness and economic unfeasibility of being just one more semi-desperate marketing evangelist schmuck with a “new exciting” marketing schpiel needing to be sold to the usual aspiring-corpses-corporate-numpties. Snake Oil? Perhaps. I prefer Monosodium Glutame as the metaphor.
2. Working with English Cut, obviously.
3. A letter I wrote a couple of months back to Doc Searls. Hughtrain was all about “Smarter Conversations”. Post-Hughtrain is about “The Smartest Conversation”, which to me is what English Cut is all about. Go read the letter.

Yes, those were my graphics at Kim Polese’s Spikesource presentation yesterday…
My take on Open Source?
Metaphorically, imagine your market was a human body. Now imagine a human body that doesn’t need vital organs in order to survive.
If you can imagine that, then that begs the question:
“Why pay a corporation for an expensive pair of lungs, when you can millions of microlungs for free?“
Indeed.
[DISCLAIMER:] I am not an authority on Open Source. I am just a cartoonist who was asked to draw some cartoons, by some people who are.

Tom (Bespoke Savile Row Tailor etc.) arrives in New York today (Thursday Afternoon).
Details here.
He’s there till Sunday afternoon, then he flies back to England and gets busy cranking out suits.
If anyone in the New York area fancies a custom-made suit made by one of the best tailors in the world, call him up on his mobile and make an appointment while he’s there.
Dailing from New York: +44 7811 388 536
Official mobile number: +44 (0) 7811 388 536. You leave out the zero when phoning from the States, for reasons quite unknown to me.
April 6, 2005

OK, I’m going to test the power of blogs here…
The other day I was thinking about the happy, fun times of younger days, namely, back when I was a junior copywriter for Leo Burnett, Chicago in the early 1990s.
One of the people I hung out with back then was a very bright young Art Director who originally hailed from Atlanta, named Carie Meier. Anyway, the details are now a bit fuzzy, but she left Burnett circa 1993 to go work for Hal Riney in San Francisco (on the Acura account, if memory serves me correctly), and then got married soon after. We lost touch in the process, as one does. Anyway, I was wondering what happened to her.
No, we never dated or anything. We were just buds. And no, I’m not looking for a date now, either. I imagine she’s happily married somewhere, with lots of kids and whatnot. But it would be good to hear how she’s doing.
If anyone out there knows who I’m talking about, please just say “Hi” from me, that I’m wishing her well, and that I’m doing fine. Thanks.
If I ever hear back from her, I’ll let you know. Maybe.
[UPDATE: August, 2005] Carie saw this page eventually and sent me an e-mail. Follow-up story here. Rock on.
“But to answer your question, if I thought my readers wanted Cafe Press tees more than they wanted tees with gapingvoid labels sewn in the collars, printed on shirts I selected, by people I selected, ordered from a website I control, I would do that.“
Go here to join in the conversation.